00;00;03;23 – 00;00;32;01

Lauren Brollier Newton

Welcome to the abundant coach. I’m your host, Lauren Brollier Newton. This is a weekly podcast about creating full spectrum success with a thriving coaching business, while making a profound difference in the world. Each week, you’ll discover insights, strategies, and inspiration to help you attract your ideal clients. Facilitate real transformation in their lives, and grow your coaching business while living your purpose with true freedom and fulfillment.

 

00;00;32;03 – 00;00;48;22

Lauren Brollier Newton

All right, well, welcome back to the Abundant Coach. I am so thrilled to have Kirsten Wells back on the show. So she came and she did a part one. Part one is not a prerequisite, so just know you can start right here, and then you can go down the Kirsten Wells rabbit hole with me. And listen to the other episode of the podcast.

 

00;00;48;22 – 00;01;11;13

Lauren Brollier Newton

But if you don’t know Kirsten Wells, she is an expert in the field of energy medicine. She’s invested more than 30 years studying different models of medicine that work with the human energy system. We’re going to go deep into that today. She’s a fellow with the Institute of Coaching at Harvard Medical School, and one of the things that Kirsten loves to do is to make something that can feel like a very big topic at the human level.

 

00;01;11;15 – 00;01;30;13

Lauren Brollier Newton

This idea of, can I actually transform my life? Can I actually transform a pattern can actually go from point A to point B during human birth in a way that feels easy? She is a master at making this very user friendly, something that can feel very big, but she will help you to find a step by step way of making this very user friendly.

 

00;01;30;13 – 00;01;51;07

Lauren Brollier Newton

What she likes to call the energetics of transformation. So she is our one and only master coach at Brave Thinking Institute. She is my personal coach. I would call her along the coaching journey that I’ve taken up. Brave thinking Institute as a client, I would call Kirsten my main coach, the person who personally coached me through many, many places in life.

 

00;01;51;11 – 00;02;04;11

Lauren Brollier Newton

Maybe we could talk about the pajama paradigm today. I don’t know if we talked about that on the last episode, but let’s do that. My mentor, friend, and faculty member here at Brave Thinking Institute, our one and only master coach, Kirsten Wells.

 

00;02;04;14 – 00;02;11;08

Kirsten Welles

Thank you Lauren. What a privilege. Pleasure it always is to be with you. And, and thank you for that wonderful introduction.

 

00;02;11;11 – 00;02;31;14

Lauren Brollier Newton

Of course. So I would like to begin, there’s something that you teach. I think if a coach that’s been certified at Brave Thinking Institute had to put an image next to Kirsten Wells, they would put this what looks like. I’ll describe it. I know everybody’s listening to this podcast. The moment where it looks like a plus sign or a cross or an intersection.

 

00;02;31;14 – 00;02;52;05

Lauren Brollier Newton

If someone had to, say, draw an image that reminds you of Kirsten Wells, that would be the image that they draw. And those of us who have been in for a long time would see a flip chart next to you. So describe to the audience, for those who are not part of the Institute or have never had this experience, describe to the audience this image that I’m talking about and what it has to do with transformation.

 

00;02;52;07 – 00;03;23;27

Kirsten Welles

Yeah, well, the image that you’re describing. So it does look like a plus sign. And then at the center of that plus nine is a red dot. And that is what you know. And I would say it’s, it’s just funny as you were presenting that I was flashing back to you, we said flip chart when I was flashing back to the very first time that I actually presents this in a training, and the teaching was actually in my coach certification training with Mary in 2009, the very first certification that the Brave Thinking Institute offered.

 

00;03;23;29 – 00;03;49;15

Kirsten Welles

There were 20 of us in that in that room, you know, and, part of the training was an opportunity for us to to stand up and present to the group. And, you know, it was just very sort of off the cuff, you know, get up, present something. And in that moment, I had the flip chart and I drew that plus sign and the red dot in the center and just began to offer that as a teaching.

 

00;03;49;20 – 00;04;13;24

Kirsten Welles

And that’s something that actually I’ve been working with. Oh my gosh. Or how many decades now? But really, since I started my work with energy medicine came out of my near-death experience. We talk about that in the other podcast, but what it is, is an orientation of us, a demonstration of our an orientation of us in what would it is to be an infinite, energetic, spiritual being.

 

00;04;13;27 – 00;04;42;18

Kirsten Welles

That’s represented by this infinite part of our nature? The vertical line, having a human experience which is represented by that horizontal line, the intersection of which where the red dot appears, is, is the present moment. So this idea that we are these energetic beings that are having this experience, part of us is infinite. And it’s in the end, part of us is finite.

 

00;04;42;21 – 00;04;56;04

Kirsten Welles

And then the transaction of that part, those parts of ourselves, that intersection of that is the red dot moment, the present moment. That’s where the rubber meets the road. So that’s what that is. And a representation of.

 

00;04;56;06 – 00;05;27;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

So the present moment is the red dot moment. So I think for many humans I won’t put everybody into this category, but I’ll tell you my experience of it, I would see in books or I would read that there that there is this were spiritual beings having a human experience. I don’t know if I’d ever heard it put that way, but I definitely believed that I was somehow a spiritual being, or there was something more than this, even if I couldn’t put a word on it or and yet I would read this, I’d be inspired, and then the book would go back on the shelf.

 

00;05;27;20 – 00;05;53;04

Lauren Brollier Newton

And I never quite knew how to find that access point. I would say, like, if you, were drawing the picture of the plus sign, I got very out on the horizontal lines very often. So in the user friendly way that you’re so good at Kiersten, how do I find that red dot moment where I can actually feel this infinite side of my nature while I’m in this human experience?

 

00;05;53;06 – 00;06;15;15

Kirsten Welles

Yeah. Great question. And why this sort of red dot moment matters when we say the present moment is the breath is key to this is because here’s the thing. Just by the very fact that we’re breathing, you know, we are we are, we we can’t breathe in the future. We can’t breathe in the past. We can only breathe in this present moment.

 

00;06;15;17 – 00;06;36;14

Kirsten Welles

And so just even just noticing my breath, taking a breath. No, you know, really breathing myself fully into this, this present moment, knowing that that is this access point. From this point of breath, I can access this infinite side of my nature. I can, you know, obviously I’m related. I’m required that I’m breathing in my my human experience.

 

00;06;36;14 – 00;07;03;00

Kirsten Welles

Right. That’s requisite to being here. And, why this also matters is that when we talk about source energy and we talk about, you know, this idea and it can feel very, you know, like a heady concept, this idea of, like, I’m an infinite spiritual being, having a human experience. Right. But just imagine this idea. And again, you kind of have to opt in for this framework to have this work so you can try it on.

 

00;07;03;03 – 00;07;25;23

Kirsten Welles

But the idea is like, where do we come from anyway? It’s like this, this idea of like before we get here in this human individuated experience or the human journey, where do we come from and where do we return to when we’re done? So this idea would be that, that we come from this idea of force, energy.

 

00;07;25;25 – 00;07;57;10

Kirsten Welles

Now that can go by many names. I you know, for me personally, I use the term unconditional love that like that source energy is this it’s a consciousness really, you know, unconditional love. And that’s what I come from. Then I come into this human journey. I’m having this individuated experience right in this human journey. And then when I’m, you know, done with this individuated journey right now as Kirsten Wells, I will return to this this source energy.

 

00;07;57;17 – 00;08;26;15

Kirsten Welles

And when that this, you know, horizontal portion of my journey is complete. So but all along, you know, I want to be able to access more and more of the infinite side of my nature into time and space, because I do that for those of you that can see, I’m seeing the infinite side of my nature, this vertical line into time and space, the horizontal and the transaction of that all takes place in that red moment, in that, in the present moment.

 

00;08;26;18 – 00;09;06;25

Kirsten Welles

And I think one of the other things and I’ll pause here, that’s really important about this, is that accessing and availing ourselves and bringing more of the infinite side of our nature into time and space in that red dot moment, the translation of that, it has to move in as in, through us. And part of that includes our autonomic nervous system, which is, you know, that’s really when I we talk about making this very user friendly in order to access more of the infinite side of our nature and then translate it into time and space in that, that horizontal line, the moment to moment in the transaction in our lives, our day to day.

 

00;09;06;27 – 00;09;11;02

Kirsten Welles

That really is about learning how to work with the autonomic nervous system.

 

00;09;11;05 – 00;09;24;29

Lauren Brollier Newton

So tell me, tell help us understand for those, who don’t know what the autonomic nervous system is, help us understand what it is and what that has to do with the red dot moment AP too.

 

00;09;25;01 – 00;09;48;03

Kirsten Welles

So, you know, in the most basic, ways that our own anomic nervous system works, most of us are familiar with the fight, flight or freeze. That’s that belongs to the sympathetic part of our autonomic nervous system. And that part of our autonomic nervous system is really geared towards just a all things survival, really is alerting us to all things that we’re navigating in the conditions of life.

 

00;09;48;05 – 00;10;10;15

Kirsten Welles

And it’s all about keeping us safe. And it’s all about survivability, and it’s all about, you know, a thermostatic setting of keeping the status quo so that we, we, we get through, you know, day to day. The other part of the autonomic nervous system, which is the parasympathetic part of the autonomic nervous system, is known as the rest digest and create portion of our nervous system.

 

00;10;10;17 – 00;10;41;29

Kirsten Welles

So when we’re in the parasympathetic part of our autonomic nervous system and that expression, the rest I just in create, we’re free to we’re not concerned with survival. We’re we’re free to create. We’re free to procreate. It’s like we’re safe. We’re we’re able to really avail ourselves of this infinite side of our nature. In that moment. And for our purposes here, when we’re talking about, our coaching and when we’re working with vision as an example, that’s the create what I love to create in this moment.

 

00;10;42;02 – 00;11;12;19

Kirsten Welles

So not being in the sympathetic part of our autonomic nervous system, which is all about things condition, it’s all about things that might be in the way it’s all about. Again, anything, that falls under that umbrella of fear, anxiety, worry, any limiting thoughts around that? Then we would want to be able to navigate ourselves from conditioned thinking in that, in the underneath the sympathetic part of our autonomic nervous system, over to the vision driven the creative under the parasympathetic.

 

00;11;12;21 – 00;11;31;03

Lauren Brollier Newton

So when I’m noticing myself having the fear driven thoughts, the survival thoughts, they’re not good enough thoughts that how is this ever going to work? Thoughts and you can feel it. I mean, even just starting to say those words, just the words themselves carry such a vibration. I notice myself in it. What’s the what’s the move to get to rest?

 

00;11;31;03 – 00;11;32;01

Lauren Brollier Newton

I just create.

 

00;11;32;04 – 00;11;55;22

Kirsten Welles

Yeah. So let’s go back to the breath immediately. It’s like to be able to of course what you’re describing is noticing something, right. We’ve got to be able to notice it first, noticing that I’m thinking those thoughts, noticing that I’m even having that feeling tone of the anxiety, the fear, the worry, the limitation, noticing that, then pausing that, just causing myself to pause and then shift my breathing.

 

00;11;55;22 – 00;12;17;26

Kirsten Welles

And one of the ways to really facilitate this, to move to the parasympathetic is to, inhale slowly through our nose, exhale slowly through our mouth like we’re exhaling through a straw. And then to repeat that a few times in a way that’s comfortable to you. And as far as a slow inhalation, slow exhalation is concerned. Now why am I exhaling.

 

00;12;17;26 – 00;12;40;02

Kirsten Welles

As though I’m exhaling through a straw? Because here’s the deal in the in the fight or flight or freeze portion of the sympathetic, expression, you can be running the flight and and exhaling deeply, but you cannot run and exhale through a straw, you know. So what this does is it kind of signals to the brain, you know, oh, you’re it’s okay.

 

00;12;40;02 – 00;13;05;22

Kirsten Welles

We’re moving. We can move over to parasympathetic rest, digesting create. We can also other breath that will activate the vagus nerve, which is part of what will allow us to relax is to, you know, inhale for a count of four and slowly, and then exhale for a count of six. So it’s a different, you know, number of inhalation count and as and a longer exhalation count.

 

00;13;05;22 – 00;13;12;00

Kirsten Welles

But again, it indicates to, our system that it’s okay, we can move to parasympathetic.

 

00;13;12;00 – 00;13;29;11

Lauren Brollier Newton

Now I love that now I feel like a noodle. I’m breathing. Talk about it. I’m like, oh, like I’m like, I’m like a wet noodle. I’m like, oh, this feels so good. Which made my mind blank. I’m like, I feel so good. All right. Thank you. Thank you, doctor Keirstead I don’t know what my next question is.

 

00;13;29;13 – 00;13;54;12

Lauren Brollier Newton

So we did a training the other day for some of our, clients where we were doing coaching skills, and I was listening to you talk about the fight flight freeze, and you said something that was really interesting to me. And now I’m paraphrasing, and I’ve made this up in my own mind, so it might not even be exactly what you said, but you said something like, there’s a a level of survival when you’re in that fight flight freeze, you’re trying to survive.

 

00;13;54;15 – 00;14;16;00

Lauren Brollier Newton

I believe you said something like you, there was a point in in evolution or it’s a point in time where you want to have that survival because you don’t want to be the one to get eaten. And so how would you how would you describe how do I know? I guess this is something that a lot of times beginning coaches have working with their clients, or just people making decisions about their own life.

 

00;14;16;02 – 00;14;39;22

Lauren Brollier Newton

How do I know when I’m really supposed to listen to that fear? Because it is a danger sign, or it is a intuition sign, versus how do I know when it’s like, oh, this is just some old archaic part of my nervous system, and I just want to move myself with that gear shift of breath into rest. I just create, like I think people get in the beginning, get nervous that they’re going to miss an important signal about danger.

 

00;14;39;25 – 00;15;03;27

Kirsten Welles

Yeah. Good point. Well, let me just tie back to what you were initially speaking to around the idea of not getting eaten. So, so, so our nervous system, this autonomic nervous system is just describing it’s a little bit of an outmoded, outdated system for our purposes today. Meaning, you know, back in the day, you know, that, you know, getting through the day was the order of the day.

 

00;15;03;27 – 00;15;26;27

Kirsten Welles

Just get to sundown and don’t get eaten. And so, you know, primitive person was out on the Serengeti. You know, visibility was one of our number one, you know, just means of where we we were was a potential threat to our survivability. So, so our nervous systems were highly geared towards visibility, as an example, to set off the nervous systems, like, be on alert.

 

00;15;26;27 – 00;15;51;29

Kirsten Welles

Right. So, but today, you know, our, our nervous system doesn’t know the difference between the internet, which is like the new Serengeti, like a click of a button, you are potentially have like global disability, right? Yeah. A nervous system is like on high alert with that. So I think it’s really important to know, like when you go to do a post, you know, on, on a, on a platform or you know, just you’re about to click that button.

 

00;15;52;05 – 00;16;17;09

Kirsten Welles

Of course, it’s very natural that your nervous system is going to be like on high alert. So but then how do I distinguish between is this the right move for me, or is there are some potential threat here? It’s real. I always run it through this. This particular filter is like, if I wasn’t required to take any additional action here, and the result, whatever’s on the other side of the actions I’m about to take, I would be in love with that.

 

00;16;17;09 – 00;16;35;24

Kirsten Welles

Like what? I love that, and the answer is yes. If I didn’t have to take any other additional action steps. And what’s on the other side of this, I would love it. Then I can really pretty much be certain that that’s just a self-limiting paradigm in the way. That’s probably not a legitimate concern.

 

00;16;35;26 – 00;16;55;09

Lauren Brollier Newton

Yeah, it reminds me and someone when I very, very first started at the institute as a client and I was becoming a coach and back in those days you did a Q and A that we had access to, that we could ask a question about our personal lives. And this is like my first mentorship with you. I had just come out of a divorce and and yet I knew that I wanted love.

 

00;16;55;11 – 00;17;09;11

Lauren Brollier Newton

I had no doubt in my mind that I wanted to fall in love again at some point, every time I would write that in my vision, I would have this nervous system. Of course I’m going to. My husband lived a double life. I always like to say like I belonged on Dateline 2020 for the stuff I found out.

 

00;17;09;11 – 00;17;25;01

Lauren Brollier Newton

You know, it’s like you’re like, there’s there’s a part of me that’s like, you’re not good at this. Danger, danger. Look at what you attracted the first time. And yet I knew when you’re saying look at the result for, you know my words. Now, forget the steps in between. Would you love the result of falling in love again?

 

00;17;25;01 – 00;17;43;15

Lauren Brollier Newton

And that was absolutely a yes. And so your recommendation to me was every time I would read my vision, it would activate that part of my nervous system that was like danger, danger, danger. And the advice that you gave me at the time, the coaching that you gave me was just put a sentence in there that says in a way that feels really good to me.

 

00;17;43;17 – 00;17;59;26

Lauren Brollier Newton

And I loved that because you said if it’s happening in a way that feels really good to you, then it’s all it’s all good. And I’ve used that in not just love. So many parts of my vision where I’m feeling that little bit of trigger, it’s like, no. And it all happened in a way that it all came together in a way that felt really good to me.

 

00;17;59;26 – 00;18;02;06

Lauren Brollier Newton

And I think that’s part of what you’re speaking to here.

 

00;18;02;09 – 00;18;25;20

Kirsten Welles

Absolutely. And that that that phrase, that statement is actually a priming statement that that supports the nervous system. Because through through my thoughts, if I think that thought, it’s all happening, you know, in a way that feels really good to me or feels life giving to me, I can pretty much relax. I don’t I mean, however it’s going to happen, it I can trust because if it feels really good to me, it feels like giving to me.

 

00;18;25;23 – 00;18;58;24

Kirsten Welles

Great, right? You know and and so that’s a that’s a wonderful priming statement that really treats really, because the nervous system and primes the nervous system. Because again, if we think about what is a feeling anyway, what what like a feeling. What is it. It’s really a label that we assign to a cascade of physiology. That’s occurring within ourselves, you know, a whole, you know, cascade of neurochemicals that that produce what we label a feeling.

 

00;18;58;26 – 00;19;20;04

Kirsten Welles

So the words that we speak, the thoughts that we think are really what are our are informing, then that whole cascade of neurochemistry. So when I say things like it’s all happening, you know, it’s happening in a way that ways that feel really good to me. I can feel that. Yes, when it’s priming my system for that.

 

00;19;20;04 – 00;19;52;01

Kirsten Welles

Now, I want to say also that words are subjective. Right? So it’s very important that we wordsmith to the degree that that that we ourselves can feel it. Right. What what word means or the effect that that has for you might not be the same effect that it has for me. As an example, I have a statement, a Prime minister, and for myself, particularly if I’m feeling any resistance or I’m in that, I’m in that red dot moment and I want to access more of this infinite side of my nature.

 

00;19;52;03 – 00;20;12;25

Kirsten Welles

I use this statement. I am bringing my very best to this moment. I am bringing my very best to this moment now. Best is a very significant word for me. Encoded in that word best is the infinite side of my nature. So when I say that, I’m actually accessing the infinite side of my nature in that statement, and it’s almost like a pump, I’m priming it.

 

00;20;12;25 – 00;20;32;05

Kirsten Welles

You know, sometimes I’m repeating that, you know, six, seven, eight, nine times before I start to really feel the infinite start to come into the present moment. Now, I share that once with a client who’s like, well, that that word best just reminds me of my third grade teacher, and that was not a good experience. So this is not going to work for me.

 

00;20;32;07 – 00;20;38;02

Kirsten Welles

And so I said, absolutely. I said, so best is not your word, but we want to find something else that is.

 

00;20;38;04 – 00;20;51;18

Lauren Brollier Newton

Yeah, I love that. And it’s interesting that you say that because as, as we were speaking about it and I said, you know, in a way that feels good, really good to me. And you said, yeah, you could say that. You could say way. That’s life giving. And I use the, I use the phrase life giving all the time.

 

00;20;51;18 – 00;21;09;05

Lauren Brollier Newton

But in that particular statement, it doesn’t have that cooling effect on my nervous system. Like, or actually it’s more of a warming effect, like a relaxed warm as in a way that feels really good to me. So I think, I think one of the things that can occur, especially when we’re new to this work or where new to coaching is we want it to happen so fast.

 

00;21;09;05 – 00;21;31;28

Lauren Brollier Newton

Like just that statement works right now. In this second. I used to joke that when I was in the beginning, doing what you said, this gear shift, like I would try to take a breath while answering emails needing a bowl of cereal. It’s like there’s there’s power in the pause, and there’s power in the ability to give ourselves a moment to, like you’re saying, wordsmith and really land on the thing that’s going to be supportive of our nervous system.

 

00;21;32;00 – 00;21;51;07

Lauren Brollier Newton

So I have a million questions I want to ask. I have this sheet of notepaper where I’m taking notes, and then I’m putting a little empty square next to everything I want to ask. And it’s filling up. There’s like 32 empty squares. So let’s just go down here. You spoke to visibility as being one of the things that back in the day, back in the way back, you know, primitive times visibility was maybe certain death.

 

00;21;51;07 – 00;22;07;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

Because here I am exposed. And I know, Kiersten, that when you very first started as the master coach at Brave Thinking Institute, our founder, Mary Morrissey, asked you to speak on some stages. And that was I’m assuming I’m going to put these words on it. Triggering to your nervous system.

 

00;22;07;23 – 00;22;07;29

Kirsten Welles

Yeah.

 

00;22;08;04 – 00;22;23;22

Lauren Brollier Newton

Did you share with the audience how, some of the ways in which you why you caused yourself to grow in that way and some of the ways in which you were able to get yourself to do the thing that at some level was causing that fight, flight or freeze response in your own nervous system?

 

00;22;23;25 – 00;22;43;13

Kirsten Welles

Absolutely. Yeah. That request, I mean, just to give context, you know, when Mary made that request, I was still in my medical practice. I was, helping to to build a integrated medical practice at that time. And so I was leading a team, and I had, of course, my own medical practice, energy medicine, in that, in that practice.

 

00;22;43;13 – 00;23;03;17

Kirsten Welles

So, you know, all day long, I’m working with our team and patients and things of that nature. And so I’m a clinician, really. I mean, I had no idea or even desire to speak on stages or teach publicly. And I was really like I was like to say, happy as a clam at high tide. They’re very comfortable, very, you know, really in my comfort zone.

 

00;23;03;19 – 00;23;36;16

Kirsten Welles

And then, you know, when Mary made this request, you know, invited me to come and help to build the institute, there was one thing that occurred at that time. That was it was right about that time was I had really from when we talk about really listening to that still small voice and really listening to the infinite side of our nature more, I was feeling that impulse that the that there was, a desire and a longing to serve at a much greater capacity than a clinical week and a clinical hour would ever allow for.

 

00;23;36;18 – 00;23;59;09

Kirsten Welles

And also remember, this is really a resume. So like, couldn’t even have like a global audience with the click of a button. They know visually that way. So so she made that request and then, and then let me know that one of the requirement would be teaching on stage and, and, I just like that was it was almost abhorrent to me.

 

00;23;59;09 – 00;24;20;14

Kirsten Welles

I mean, I can’t describe it any other way. That was I was like, I just want to context for this. That’s how afraid I was. And, but I knew and I think this is the this is that choice point for all of us, you know, again and again and again is like when we really lean in, are we here to serve?

 

00;24;20;16 – 00;24;47;05

Kirsten Welles

You know, our life’s calling. Are we here to say yes to that infinite impulse of life that wants always to a fuller, expanded expression of itself by means of everything, whether it’s a blade of grass or a tree or us. And at that point in my life I had trained myself, you know, in part again, coming out of my near-death experience in my 20s, I knew to listen to that part of myself.

 

00;24;47;05 – 00;25;11;29

Kirsten Welles

And I knew to to say yes to it no matter what, you know, at that point. So so that’s the part that I, I was willing to cause myself to take those steps. Right. And then I also knew at that point and had strategy around holding image in mind. So that’s vision. So I actually started with a really like a single image.

 

00;25;11;29 – 00;25;34;02

Kirsten Welles

And that was one where I’m walking up on stage and I’m turning and there’s like a welcoming audience, you know, Mary’s greeting me, but in that, in that I could see the work going on and, and I just knew that I was serving in the ways that I’m meant to serve, you know, and, and I and I was feeling tone of it and it was fun.

 

00;25;34;03 – 00;25;57;21

Kirsten Welles

I also stated that it was fun. You know, we talk about in ways that feel really good to me. It was fun and I was really living on purpose. And, and so this was just like a single snapshot image. And I would just repeat that over and over and over and over again. And then as I was getting up on stages and doing things, I mean, again, in the beginning it was scary.

 

00;25;57;21 – 00;26;30;00

Kirsten Welles

And Mary was very generous. You know, she would co-teacher with me, you know, so I had, you know, so like having training wheels, you know, and you just over time more reps, more confidence etc. and then actually the turning point of enjoying it. But one of the things that I love to kind of share about that particular story is there was a moment this is a few years ago where I was running up on stage and Mary was greeting me, and I turned and and I was like, whoa, that’s the that’s that moment.

 

00;26;30;03 – 00;26;46;21

Kirsten Welles

And it was. And it’s fun and there’s music and I’m on, I’m serving. I’m in my, you know, on purpose. And, and I was just like, that is the power of an image. That is the power of image. And, and then of course, causing ourselves to, to do what’s required to serve it.

 

00;26;46;23 – 00;27;04;03

Lauren Brollier Newton

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, well, the way that the subconscious mind works is it doesn’t know the difference between something vividly imagined, something real, you know, so you you programed your subconscious mind, that person is someone who speaks on stages and has fun and is and it accepted it because it will. It looks up to anything that we give it.

 

00;27;04;05 – 00;27;24;28

Lauren Brollier Newton

So I want to go a little bit down into the roots of, you know, one of the things that I find interesting here at the Institute, we have Mary Morrissey, who’s the founder of our institute, and she’s been studying this for more than 50 years. And she had a mentor named Jack Boland. And you’ve heard me talk in other episodes about Jack ball, and you’ll hear you’ll hear me talk about it more.

 

00;27;25;00 – 00;27;49;08

Lauren Brollier Newton

And going back previous to that, you have this lineage, this, yeah, I call it a lineage of transcendental thinkers like Emerson and Thoreau. And there’s this through line, and I believe that if you listen or you’re listening to this, and if you resonate with this, we’re all in some sort of a soul family where this is our lineage, that there is a transcendent self, that there is a part of me that is greater than any circumstance and, and situation and condition.

 

00;27;49;10 – 00;28;09;25

Lauren Brollier Newton

So recently I asked Mary, who was Jack Boleyn’s mentor, because I’m very curious about the lineage, the history of this and the way that things come about, because I think for those of us that do feel resonance with us and our our soul family, if you want to call it that, there’s this legacy piece, this lineage piece where it’s like, I want to know everything about how everything was created here.

 

00;28;09;28 – 00;28;29;03

Lauren Brollier Newton

And she said, you know, I actually don’t know. I don’t know who Jack Boleyn’s mentor was. And so with that thought in mind, I’m on an exploration to find this out. That’s side note, and I’ll find it out and I’ll share it with the audience when I do. But for you, Kirsten, I want to hear a little bit about you spoke about the infinite and the finite, not plus sign with the red dot at the center.

 

00;28;29;03 – 00;28;38;16

Lauren Brollier Newton

And you mentioned that you really started working with it for a long. So did you have a mentor that shared that with you? It was at a download like where did this come from then?

 

00;28;38;16 – 00;29;06;05

Kirsten Welles

That was one of the things that was given to me in my, time when I, during my, near-death experience when I was, you know, and just that’s in the other episode. So I won’t go into the whole details here, but what my, experience was, you know, over a ten day period, where I would go each night to the other side, as it were, across the veils and then have experiences that are very classic to that kind of, you know, described experience.

 

00;29;06;05 – 00;29;33;28

Kirsten Welles

But part of that was also being, shown and, and I say shown. I mean, it was almost like installed in me an understanding of, you know, what I now I’m calling the energetics of transformation, or you know, how to make the transaction of, of our infinite side of our nature into time and space or user friendly and that, that, that plus nine, that cross sign with the red dot was, was part of that.

 

00;29;34;00 – 00;29;56;02

Kirsten Welles

That’s where that came from. And I just started working with it and just and, and then it has developed and I always love to say, this is one of the things about, of course, the infinite side of our nature and the access to that is as advertised, it’s infinite. So, you know that that plus sign with the red dot reveals more and more to me.

 

00;29;56;04 – 00;30;13;05

Kirsten Welles

The more and more I transact with it, the more and more I work with it, the more and more I, you know, again, access that on the infinite side, it allows that information to come in. And that’s, you know, that is an ever upward spiral of, of experience and, and expansion and knowing that. But that’s where that came from originally.

 

00;30;13;07 – 00;30;31;10

Lauren Brollier Newton

So fascinating. So I want to hear more too. So for anyone listening to this, there’s many people who listen and do this transformational coaching that we teach at Brave Thinking Institute. Lots of our certified coaches listen, and there’s lots of coaches out there, and even people who aren’t coaches, they just love the content of the podcast who listen.

 

00;30;31;13 – 00;30;56;19

Lauren Brollier Newton

So I would love to hear you describe how this pertains to this modality of coaching. In other words, there’s all sorts of coaching on the planet, and it’s all very useful in its own way. Of course, there’s directive coaching and all sorts of things. Why do you feel like it’s so important in a coaching relationship for the coach to have relationship to the infinite, finite and be able to describe it to the client?

 

00;30;56;19 – 00;31;03;09

Lauren Brollier Newton

Like, what difference does that make in the client’s life if the coaches practice in knowing how to bring that in to super?

 

00;31;03;09 – 00;31;30;22

Kirsten Welles

That’s a really high level. Questions, a great question. I think in our particular model of coaching, which is an evocative, transformational model of coaching, meaning we’re evoking in partnership with our client, we’re supporting that infinite side of their nature to to be revealed and made and known, and to help the client develop a relationship with that, meaning that the client is the highest authority of their experience.

 

00;31;30;22 – 00;32;09;18

Kirsten Welles

We’re simply joining with them. And of course, you know, the idea that, and I again, I use the reference, I will use the reference, the Bible here as a metaphysical handbook. But this idea where two or more gathered, you actually, energetically, are in partnership, you know, we’re all connected to this infinite source. So when we as the coach are, living from this, this, this framework ourselves, and then we’re with our client, we’re actually, you know, there’s there’s a there’s a greater access, I gather, in partnership this way.

 

00;32;09;20 – 00;32;28;26

Kirsten Welles

And so I think that that’s another piece that’s so important when we’re partnering with our, our client is that we’re able to listen and receive information from the infinite side of our nature. It’s not a separate nature. It’s not like they’re infinite side of their nature. In the infinite side of my nature over here. No, it’s one thing happening.

 

00;32;28;28 – 00;32;52;01

Kirsten Welles

And so we’re able to to hear and receive that information, which again, in an evocative model, we’re simply offering what we receive to our client for them to try it on. Different than directive. And again, as you said, Lauren, there were times that I, you know, I would want to hire a directive coach. I would want to hire a consultant type of coach where they come up with the answers for me.

 

00;32;52;01 – 00;33;11;26

Kirsten Welles

Yes. This is not that particular model. This is a discovery model where we are leaning in and discovering again from the infinite side of our nature, not from the, human finite side of our nature. Right. Which has wonderful, you know, information, but it’s limited.

 

00;33;11;28 – 00;33;40;06

Lauren Brollier Newton

Yeah. I think the power of I mean, you said earlier in this, people who aren’t super familiar with coaching wouldn’t have caught it. But earlier in this episode, I asked you a question and you said the words try this on and then you allow the audience to try it on. And I think this what sets this type of transformational, evocative, brave thinking coaching apart is that I can go to a directive coach and I might choose to go to a directive coach, as you mentioned, for for some, for some purpose.

 

00;33;40;09 – 00;34;07;02

Lauren Brollier Newton

And yet I my experience with clients over the years when I got my coaching certification I went is I worked, I didn’t I didn’t set out to attract this particular audience. But this just ended up being the audience is very left brained professionals, lawyers, doctors, real estate agents, salespeople who tended to be more figure it out mode as their mode of operation, and they would not actually categorize themselves as spiritual.

 

00;34;07;02 – 00;34;26;22

Lauren Brollier Newton

So it’s hilarious that they found me. And somehow we had this, human agreement to to be more spiritual together. But one of the things that I would find is like, for example, I had a lot of real estate clients who would real estate agent clients is what I should say, who they had been to a directive coach that’s had knock on a thousand doors, send out this many fliers, attend this.

 

00;34;26;24 – 00;34;44;26

Lauren Brollier Newton

And even though they wanted the result, they couldn’t get themselves to do it because it was someone else telling them a method that didn’t necessarily feel life giving to them. And then they would learn that they could actually download source, as we like to say, ideas from the infinite side of their own nature that would take them to the place they wanted to go, but actually felt good to them.

 

00;34;44;26 – 00;35;02;11

Lauren Brollier Newton

Going back to that phrase and their businesses will skyrocket because now the step is in alignment. The step is sourced from them. I’m telling them how to how to, so to speak, source the idea. I’m giving them that and I might give them some of my own ideas. But ultimately the client is picking the idea that lights up for them.

 

00;35;02;11 – 00;35;23;23

Lauren Brollier Newton

As you taught me and you taught me the phrase lights up like a Christmas tree. So I would say that the client let’s for the idea that lights up like a Christmas tree or there’s some energy to it. And so I think there’s very something very clear that I want to distinguish to the audience here is it’s not that an evocative coaching the client isn’t going to receive all sorts of powerful information that’s going to lead them to the result they are.

 

00;35;23;25 – 00;35;30;17

Lauren Brollier Newton

It’s just that I’m not going to tell them they need to or have to do this one certain step to get to the result that they would like.

 

00;35;30;19 – 00;35;38;05

Kirsten Welles

Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Well said. And it’s exactly right in terms of our our framework. Yes.

 

00;35;38;07 – 00;36;04;27

Lauren Brollier Newton

So, Kirsten, going back to this idea of this lineage, I, I’ve always been curious. I’m just going to ask you, this is for selfish reasons. Now, although I would guess that if the audience resonates with this podcast will resonate with this question. There was so you have this near-death experience you’re working with this infinite and finite, with the red dot, this access point, this present moment, and that’s reveals more and more of itself to you.

 

00;36;04;29 – 00;36;30;03

Lauren Brollier Newton

So I want to hear about if I had seen Kirsten Wells in your medical practice prior to you becoming a certified coach and having the Dream Builder program, what what were those sessions like? And even down to, like, the medicine you were practicing? And how did that influence what has become, not only you being certified here, but you really supporting Mary in co-creating our coaching modality.

 

00;36;30;05 – 00;37;02;05

Kirsten Welles

Oh, okay. Okay. So feels like six questions, but that’s all right. Thank. I wasn’t been brewing this question for many, many. Let’s bring it all together. Well, let’s just reverse engineer. So, so just the near-death experience occurred in, in my late 20s, right. That time, I had no knowledge or even inkling that I would ever go into a study of, you know, energy medicine or practice it, for that matter.

 

00;37;02;08 – 00;37;30;14

Kirsten Welles

Although the the the results of that, that experience led me to, acupuncture, and symptoms that I had had had for nine months, were resolved, you know, that Western medicine couldn’t couldn’t help with were resolved in six weeks. These were these were significant neurological symptoms. I mean, I had no short term memory. I had, you know, speech impairments, I had all kinds of things that were really stressful.

 

00;37;30;16 – 00;37;55;01

Kirsten Welles

And then that was resolved. So I always knew that, you know, I had this massive impression of, traditional Chinese medicine, acupuncture. I knew it would always be part of my health care. I never knew I would study it. So there’s there’s this kind of time-released factor that goes on in my life for a period of time where eventually I’m, and my career in the, in the film business was the film industry for many years.

 

00;37;55;01 – 00;38;26;00

Kirsten Welles

And then I kind of that was sort of like, what’s next? Big open wide question mark. Right. So the fast forward on that was, you know, this infinite side of my nature kept drawing me to to the study of traditional Chinese medicine, acupuncture, so much so that I would commit to enrolling in what at that time was a, I remember, I remember it was because I had been in school in years, and this was a, a four year master’s program.

 

00;38;26;02 – 00;38;49;13

Kirsten Welles

If I went full time and I wasn’t going to be able to go full time to start with, so would probably be about six years. And I remember being so resistant to this idea. But again, I want to come back to listening to this infinite side of our nature. And there’s still some small voice. And now, after that near-death experience, that was that was something that I was it was available to me to hear.

 

00;38;49;13 – 00;39;13;22

Kirsten Welles

And I knew, okay, just enroll in the program, you know, do it. Do the do right. So this is how I did it. I enrolled in the program and I said, here’s the deal. I need to know by the end of the first semester that I am unequivocally meant to be doing this, you know, like in a way that I completely understand.

 

00;39;13;22 – 00;39;32;20

Kirsten Welles

Like, there’s no question that this is my next step in my path or I’m just I’m going to enroll you because I didn’t want to get I really did not want to go to school for six years. I’m going to be straight up honest about that. So so I’m like, I like throw down the gantlet. So fast forward.

 

00;39;32;20 – 00;39;55;09

Kirsten Welles

And that was at the end of the the first semester, we had had a, had had a class with the founder of the school I was going to for my acupuncture, my master’s degree, Doctor Kim and the exit exam from that class was you had a meeting with him, and, so was like, each student had, like, 15 minutes with him.

 

00;39;55;11 – 00;40;15;04

Kirsten Welles

And so I was on my way to my exit meeting with him, and I’m walking up the stairs to his office was located. And I heard these words, be open to what happens next. And I’m like, what? And you know what? Okay, so I walk in and just to give you the shorter version of the story, we’re sitting there and I knew that he was actually leaving the next day.

 

00;40;15;04 – 00;40;33;09

Kirsten Welles

He was going to, to China. The next day. And he was taking a student with him. They were kind of doing a, a pre trip for, a trip. They were going to take it later in the spring with other students. They were going to find some of these spiritual sites. And, and I knew he was leaving the next day for that.

 

00;40;33;09 – 00;40;54;05

Kirsten Welles

And, anyway, sat down and, he said to me, he said, you know, I saw in a meditation that, that maybe you would like to come on this trip in the spring, and he may extend his invitation to me. And literally I said to him, and then when I said, could I go tomorrow? I have no idea.

 

00;40;54;07 – 00;41;25;04

Kirsten Welles

I literally like and there’s a part of me that’s watching myself, observing myself as I’m saying these words, and I’m thinking like, who’s even saying this tomorrow? So, yeah, you know, and and what I loved about Doctor Cam is that I was kind of like, he’s a spiritual Indiana Jones. He’s just like, he’s like, he’s that actually, I had thought about that, but there was no there’s the plane, there was no plane ticket, etc. but he picks the phone up and he calls his travel agent in that moment, and he asked if there’s one seat on the flight.

 

00;41;25;07 – 00;41;39;16

Kirsten Welles

And he said, oh, he said, there’s a seat. He said, you need, you know, and there was a whole thing of, you are going to pay cash. And, you know, but the main thing was, okay, a visa going to China the next day. So I want to make this story a little faster so we don’t take up the whole podcast.

 

00;41;39;22 – 00;42;00;25

Kirsten Welles

But a series of things occurred. The most significant, I would say, is with the Chinese embassy, where I drove to the Chinese embassy later that morning with my passport. There was a very nice gentleman there, and I explained to him that this opportunity of a lifetime and and he said, explaining that they don’t even in even with a death in the family or an emergency, it takes five days minimum to get a visa.

 

00;42;00;28 – 00;42;14;11

Kirsten Welles

But he said, let me, let me see. You took my passport. You should come back tomorrow morning. And we’ll see, you know, if it if it’s processed. Yeah. So I took it passport. I go back the next morning on and I’m literally on my way to the airport. At this point I was able to get the ticket.

 

00;42;14;11 – 00;42;29;29

Kirsten Welles

I was able to get all the things in place. The passport, the visa was the key. I walk in and there is this. Not a nice, friendly person as there was the day before that. There was this woman sitting there and she literally has a shoebox of a passport. And I explained why. I’m there to see if my passport is available.

 

00;42;30;02 – 00;42;51;28

Kirsten Welles

She starts thumbing through the passport. I hadn’t, and then she does. She shakes her head, you know, and she puts the box back down on the counter and gets up and walks out and I’m like, well, okay. So my heart sort of things, but I, I, you know, I was prepared for me not to have a visa. The next day is 24 hours, but I’m like, I’m not leaving without my passport.

 

00;42;52;01 – 00;43;09;01

Kirsten Welles

I’ve got to get my passport back. So about five minutes later, a gentleman comes out and he walks back over and I explained, sir, I must, you know, I’m got to get my passport back. Picks up the same shoe box thumbing through it, and then pulls out my passport, opens it and hands it to me. It’s my passport.

 

00;43;09;01 – 00;43;45;25

Kirsten Welles

It has the visa. So I’m like, what? Like run out? I jump in the car. My friend was waiting for me. Take me to the airport. We’re going. We’re I’m not I’m not on the way. The airport. So, you know, I’m sitting on that plane as it’s taking off and I’m thinking like, this is just totally the hand of God, you know, like it’s picking me up and, and, the other key element to this, to just the sidebar, because the, the other student who was going with Doctor Kim and myself when we arrived at the airport, we’re checking in and he realizes that he has left his passport in his girlfriend’s car, in

 

00;43;45;25 – 00;44;02;18

Kirsten Welles

his jacket hanging over the seat, and she is driven away and there’s no way to reach her. So Jason can’t even travel with us to, to to to China in the moment, to Beijing. We have to we’ve got to wait for him, you know, three days for him together. But here’s the thing. I’m sitting on the plane thinking, am I going to die?

 

00;44;02;23 – 00;44;26;28

Kirsten Welles

Like, what is this like? I really am like, what is this whole thing? But this whole trip, it’s insane. And so here’s the thing. It’s set in motion a whole series of events that would occur in both in our trip in, in China. But also I ended up in Tibet, and that was not part of the plan. And that came through a series of events while we were in China.

 

00;44;27;00 – 00;44;53;04

Kirsten Welles

And while I was in Tibet, a whole other series of events occurred and that answered this question of unequivocally, is this my next step? And yes, it is. You know, in case you had any any question marks here soon. So I came back and really everything began to just pick up speed from there. I was fully committed to my training, fully committed to the six years, studied different forms of energy medicine along the way.

 

00;44;53;12 – 00;45;24;27

Kirsten Welles

Fast forward to my, you know, medical practice. I was, you know, trained and and licensed as an acupuncturist. I really didn’t pursue that as much as I pursued the energy medicine. And if you were to answer your question, what it would be like to be in my medical practice on the table, I was really working energetically with my clients much in the way that I do today as a coach and evocative coach, just simply without, a diagnosis or without of something physical and a treatment plan.

 

00;45;25;00 – 00;45;49;09

Kirsten Welles

But really like the, the, the what I was really working with clients was, is that we are, you know, energy and all of that has potential. And we get to determine and design in fact and direct what we would love to do with that potential. And then, of course, there are things we’ve all discovered that are in the way of that.

 

00;45;49;11 – 00;45;58;10

Kirsten Welles

But when we have the tools and the strategy to flatten these things, that up until now are in the way, and that’s where transformation is occurring.

 

00;45;58;12 – 00;46;31;01

Lauren Brollier Newton

So powerful. When I think about what helps me to feel the infinite side of my nature. And of course, there’s we know there’s no one size fits all for this, but one of the statements that has supported me in really accessing that infinite side of my nature, that what you just said reminded me of, is this idea that if energy can neither be created nor destroyed, so I’m energy, and that means that there is a part of me, at least in energy, that goes on infinitely.

 

00;46;31;03 – 00;47;15;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

And therefore, before I took my first breath, and after all this body lays down, there is a part that is infinite. So from that, place of knowing that as an energetic beings are just accessing the infinite side of my nature, that there is this infinite, that has something to do beyond this body, that if I think about that and I think about that idea, then I feel like in some of the similar ways that the word best brings you and it is encoded in that, that this idea of, energy can either be created nor destroyed, taps me into that vertical and that finite coming together.

 

00;47;15;22 – 00;47;17;09

Lauren Brollier Newton

Right there in the red dot moment.

 

00;47;17;12 – 00;47;19;15

Kirsten Welles

Yeah. Can I may say something about that.

 

00;47;19;16 – 00;47;20;27

Lauren Brollier Newton

Yes, please.

 

00;47;20;29 – 00;47;41;05

Kirsten Welles

Because as you’re speaking about that, I think I think when we talk about first, when you say energy can be created or destroyed, but it can be transmuted and it and and again it it it’s I always think of you know, we talk about this source energy. Where do we come from. What do we return to to are really, you know, just and and I’m going to use just for my words.

 

00;47;41;05 – 00;48;08;13

Kirsten Welles

I would call this, an unconditional love. That that is my experience of it is it’s beyond words. It’s like even that word doesn’t even touch it quite honestly. Right. But but to evoke it in the moment, to access moments, remember it in the moment for me is I will ask often the prompts, and this is something I would give to my clients as well, is like, what would love say here?

 

00;48;08;16 – 00;48;31;18

Kirsten Welles

You know, what would love do here? You know? And then wait and allow love this unconditional love to to make itself known. This is my true nature, to make itself known in as in through me. This individuated me into time and space. And I’ve had so many incredible moments of, just stepping out of, you know, the, the way of the persona, the personality.

 

00;48;31;22 – 00;48;55;06

Kirsten Welles

Right? And allowing my true nature to move in as in, through me. That has just been like, you know, unconditional love in those moments. But that’s always been just, just a go to for me because there’s so much that’s transactional in our human journey moment to moment, like, you know, just and, and so many of those moments where you can feel the persona and the personality engaging and it’s like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

 

00;48;55;06 – 00;49;37;20

Kirsten Welles

Okay, let me just pause. You know, just shift my breathing and allow love, allow the infinite side of my nature love to move in as in and through me. And, I have one story that just is coming, and I’m seeing it. I’m doing so like, I’ve got my, you know, so the demonstrated this in a way that I just, I still to this day have like I, when I think of the story and the experience of was chills you know, and that was when my son Cameron was in first grade, he had a, a teacher who just unfortunately, at the level of fact and sadly, her, her husband died very

 

00;49;37;20 – 00;49;59;19

Kirsten Welles

suddenly. And, you know, really, she really needed to be grieving and not with a bunch of little kids, you know? And so there were some things that were happening that were kind of unskillful in the, in the classroom. And some of that was, you know, a tragic camera. And and when I knew she wasn’t going to be going anywhere, I had him, we, we work with something called the energy bubble.

 

00;49;59;21 – 00;50;22;10

Kirsten Welles

And the energy bubble is a tool where, you know, if you imagine you extend your arms out to either side and kind of imagine a circumference or full circumference, that’s really the bulk of our personal energy space just for purposes of imagining. Right. And putting on a bubble. Now, I want to say, as I’m sharing this, this tool, that it is not a bubble of protection, because if I say it’s a bubble of protection, I’m going to trigger my sympathetic response.

 

00;50;22;11 – 00;50;39;23

Kirsten Welles

Ooh, I thought there’s something out there for me to be protected from. But what it does is it actually creates a space that allows, more of an organizing principle for my own personal energy. And what you can say with the intention of this energy bubble is that it’s permeable, but only to that energy, which is for my highest good.

 

00;50;39;25 – 00;50;54;11

Kirsten Welles

Okay. Coming in through that bubble is for my highest good. And I can, of course, release whatever is no longer required through it. But that’s it. You kind of put it on, you know, it can have a color, you know, like mine is turquoise and sparkly. And for Cameron, as we’re driving to school, we’re putting this bubble on.

 

00;50;54;11 – 00;51;09;09

Kirsten Welles

And I didn’t get into the details of it. I just let him know that we’re putting this bubble on, and all the energy that comes through that bubble is for your highest good. And, you know, like like that’s like superhero energy’s coming in and kind of left it at that. I, you know his first grade and his bubble was striped.

 

00;51;09;09 – 00;51;25;19

Kirsten Welles

It was orange and blue and green because orange was his favorite color. Blue was mine and green was his dad. So at the striped bubble. But about a week after we’ve been doing this, we’re on our way home one day and he says, mom, mom, guess what happened today? And I’m like, what? Because I saw Mrs. Lacey’s words and Mrs. Lacey was teacher.

 

00;51;25;19 – 00;51;40;14

Kirsten Welles

I saw her words bounce off my bubble. And, because that was the other thing I said to anything that’s not, you know, good for you. Just bounces off your bubble. So he said, I saw her words bounce off my bubble today. And guess what happened next? Now I’m thinking in my mind, okay? He’s a, you know, subtle point.

 

00;51;40;14 – 00;52;04;09

Kirsten Welles

Like what? They blew up. They you know, she blew up I don’t know, you know. And he it says is that her words bounce off my boat. They bounce back to her and they turned into love. Oh my gosh. Like. And I realized in that moment what he saw was energy returning to its source, energy returning to its source.

 

00;52;04;09 – 00;52;24;13

Kirsten Welles

He saw those words. They weren’t, you know, they were unskilled. They bounce off the bubble. But they they returned to her and returned to their source, which is unconditional love. He saw them turn into love. And I and I that that so informed me of, again how we’re transacting here and so super, powerful.

 

00;52;24;15 – 00;52;39;08

Lauren Brollier Newton

So powerful. I think if I could give a coach advice, ultimately it doesn’t actually matter. The actions you take, you can post on them and you can host workshops. You can do everything you like. It really, actually doesn’t matter. The actions you.

 

00;52;39;08 – 00;52;40;24

Kirsten Welles

Take. Yes, yes.

 

00;52;40;26 – 00;52;43;01

Lauren Brollier Newton

If you’re not tapping into source first.

 

00;52;43;04 – 00;52;44;24

Kirsten Welles

Right? Yes, yes.

 

00;52;44;26 – 00;53;06;28

Lauren Brollier Newton

Because if you’re coming and I have found this time and time again, you know, when you’re just like, resistant of something, you know, I, I’ve many times as a client of the institute been like, yeah, but tell me exactly what to post. You know, tell me, Kirsten, exactly what to do. And you’ve given me a framework, or Mary’s given me a framework, or the institute giving me a framework to connect to source first.

 

00;53;07;01 – 00;53;30;15

Lauren Brollier Newton

And when I do that, every freaking time, my mind is blown. When I actually give myself the time, the space, the intention to really tap in there first and not do anything. Not source ideas, not brainstorm, not post, not go to a networking meeting until I feel that full. I have goosebumps just saying it like that. Full connection.

 

00;53;30;17 – 00;53;31;20

Kirsten Welles

 

00;53;31;22 – 00;53;42;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

That’s why that is ultimately Kirsten. Why I think my personal business grew so fast is because when you guys told me to do something in that regard, I was willing to do it.

 

00;53;42;22 – 00;53;43;24

Kirsten Welles

Yes.

 

00;53;43;26 – 00;53;56;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

And when you’re speaking to your son, talking about the the the words just bounced off and returned to love. That’s it. That that’s like done period. End of sentence and yes.

 

00;53;56;21 – 00;54;13;20

Kirsten Welles

Right. Yeah. He he witnessed that thing about I’m sorry to interrupt you because yes I here’s the fact that he could see it, you know and then and really see that that’s what that’s what that’s what we’re transacting with. That’s you know, he had no conscious idea of that thought continuum. Sorry I didn’t. Yeah.

 

00;54;13;22 – 00;54;38;12

Lauren Brollier Newton

Exactly. It’s like and I want the audience to know there’s a rigor to connecting with the source if you’ve not done it before. And there’s a level of patience. And there I you know, I think about you, Kirsten, when we. Kirsten and I did some 1 to 1 coaching together and, Kirsten would talk about you would talk about your connection to Ernest Holmes as a as a master teacher of information.

 

00;54;38;15 – 00;55;02;22

Lauren Brollier Newton

And you would say, you know, I every time you just had this relationship with Ernest Holmes as a master teacher, that I would think to myself very impatiently, I want a master teacher that’s like that. I want to, I want to, I want to read someone or feel connected to some long gone teacher and have this connection. And there was a part of me that was impatient, that I just wanted to be able to access it as fast as you could and, and, read something and feel that way.

 

00;55;02;24 – 00;55;25;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

And then when you invited me to move out of that, like, let’s move this, this one to this push or whatever. And I think you said something like, well, let’s, let’s just add to your vision that you are connected to a, a teacher, a book or something that creates a feeling of this and this and that. And it wasn’t very long after that I started to read Emerson that I just Emerson.

 

00;55;25;22 – 00;55;47;04

Lauren Brollier Newton

I’m still all this to say for the audience that there is going to be a want a part of you that goes, how do I connect to that source and how do I do it and how I want it faster, and I want to feel it every day. So help us, Kirsten, understand simple ways in the beginning where I can start to access that love and me, that unconditional love, that source energy.

 

00;55;47;07 – 00;56;13;11

Kirsten Welles

Yeah, I very question and, and I think yeah. So I think there’s two things around what you’re speaking to Lauren that’s important is that the part of us is in the personality, self is often noticed. We’re impatient because why are we impatient? Because we want something to happen faster. While all of that’s an indication of time, and our intent side of our nature is not time bound, it doesn’t know time.

 

00;56;13;13 – 00;56;29;02

Kirsten Welles

Time is a construct of the finite portion of our experience. Right. So that’s just a note to self. Where am I? Oh, I’m really coming from the human finite side of my experience. When I notice impatience or I notice I, I wanted to go faster or you know, that that thing. So it’s just good to know where I am.

 

00;56;29;02 – 00;56;52;26

Kirsten Welles

And again, that just bringing myself back to the breath, bringing myself back to you. We didn’t talk about meditation, but meditation, even in the most informal sense of just sitting down and being quiet like still, you know, you know, just for periods of time, five, ten minutes is so helpful. But I think, again, using a template or a primer for love is really useful too.

 

00;56;52;29 – 00;57;13;04

Kirsten Welles

Is like what in what ways in my life right now, in my human journey, do I experience love? Do I know this feeling of love? Just unconditional love? I mean, my my dog number was like a number one source for me of just knowing that feeling, an expanded feeling of love, children, you know, all kinds of different ways.

 

00;57;13;04 – 00;57;45;24

Kirsten Welles

That being in nature, you know, are many different ways that we feel expanded and feel connected. And you’ll love and feel a part of this beautiful, universe. And then beyond that, we are this consciousness of love. So anything that we can use to bring in, even if it’s like a primer, rather like a template that we can kind of match to and and again, thinking those thoughts means bringing in those images in our mind will begin to allow us to have that, that experience.

 

00;57;45;27 – 00;58;07;27

Kirsten Welles

And then the other part of this just to speak to it is, is this is also part of of building that trust, muscle, trusting the process of it, knowing that if we are committed, taking these steps not, you know, just to the best of our ability. Like, again, you know, thorough has that great word endeavor, you know, to write.

 

00;58;07;27 – 00;58;22;08

Kirsten Welles

It’s not there’s we’re not white knuckling this, you know, so that we get it right. We’re allowing ourselves just, you know, if we find ourselves sort of off course is bringing ourselves back to love, bringing ourselves back and, and trusting in that, in that process.

 

00;58;22;08 – 00;58;44;04

Lauren Brollier Newton

So there is a, I just evoked a memory of when we were doing our coaching together, and, I had the privilege of being your client, and I was wanting to experience this feeling of unconditional love because we talked about it. And I go into a meditation and I basically just ask the question before meditation, and I’m, I’m a guided meditation person because it’s just easier for me.

 

00;58;44;06 – 00;59;05;21

Lauren Brollier Newton

I know that’s not there’s not a one size fits all for meditation. I’m listening to a guided meditation that I knew was very conducive for helping me to get into that place. The question I asked was, show me ways in which I can more deeply experience and and show love. And I, I don’t know if you remember the story, but the next morning I go to take a shower.

 

00;59;05;23 – 00;59;18;07

Lauren Brollier Newton

And this is when Cameron and I were living in a super tiny, tiny little, duplex where it had one of those old sliding shower doors where it’s super convenient because you can never quite get the right angle.

 

00;59;18;09 – 00;59;18;14

Kirsten Welles

Or.

 

00;59;18;15 – 00;59;41;25

Lauren Brollier Newton

Whatever. So I opened this January door, and, I turned the shower on, and I looked down and there was a spider in the bathtub. Now, previous to this, I had been a kill the spider person. Like, smash the spider. I’m terrified of spiders and, like, just kill it, you know? And I had turned the shower on, and this little spider had, you know, gone into a ball like they will when the water hits it.

 

00;59;41;27 – 01;00;13;23

Lauren Brollier Newton

And it was like a cartoon character. I just started crying and my eyes just like tears, like springing out of my eyes because I felt like the oneness between I like. It makes me cry, thinking if I felt the one with me and the other living being, and I just immediately felt like this unconditional love for this being that I had just, you know, accidentally caused to curl into a ball was so interesting because the night before, after my coaching session with you, I had asked, show me, show me with this hoop.

 

01;00;13;28 – 01;00;14;28

Lauren Brollier Newton

And it showed me.

 

01;00;15;00 – 01;00;15;21

Kirsten Welles

Yeah, you know.

 

01;00;15;21 – 01;00;46;22

Lauren Brollier Newton

That to Kirsten’s point or points earlier about evocative coaching and infinite intelligence. And, Kirsten had not I would never have been able to tell Lauren. I think you should turn on your shower and accidentally kill a spider as a way to access this hour. She couldn’t know that for me, but she could give me the tools in which to begin to find my own way in which I will, you know, conduct with this energy.

 

01;00;46;24 – 01;00;47;15

Kirsten Welles

It’s beautiful.

 

01;00;47;19 – 01;01;03;27

Lauren Brollier Newton

I love your invitation to all of us to find an access point that we already have. You mentioned your dog ways. We feel love, and you can go into that meditation. Kirsten invited you to. And for five minutes, just connect with that energy that you already know and see where it takes you.

 

01;01;03;29 – 01;01;37;17

Kirsten Welles

Yeah, there’s another there. Super quick, like, just, template for that, which I was talking about with actually Mary the other evening, we were laughing about this because again, it was said to put your attention because remember where your attention goes, right? You know, it expands and the intention of and the attention of five things a day that are of beauty now, beauty subjective again, that you find that that of beauty and document these five things a day of beauty that are smaller than a breadbox.

 

01;01;37;19 – 01;01;53;27

Kirsten Welles

And the funny thing about that, we were laughing was that Kevin Cameron, at one point he heard me giving this to somebody, asked me where he’s 21, but but not when he asked when he when he said this to me was in his was ten, he said, what’s a breadbox?

 

01;01;53;29 – 01;01;55;19

Lauren Brollier Newton

You’re like, oh yeah, that is old school.

 

01;01;55;27 – 01;02;22;04

Kirsten Welles

And I thought he might want to, you know, like that. So what is a bread box. So you know. Yeah. But something but five things of beauty. Smaller than a bread box that you document. And what begins to happen is beauty begins to emerge. Beauty and love to me are synonymous. Unconditional beauty, love. So these things we begin to and it’s just like it’s like just sort of like your experience with the spider in the shower.

 

01;02;22;06 – 01;02;29;28

Kirsten Welles

This world opens up in a way. And our relationship to it now it is transformed.

 

01;02;30;00 – 01;02;45;11

Lauren Brollier Newton

So good, so good. Okay, we’re gonna have to have you back for part three, because I have, like a million more questions. But I am going to ask you the question. I’m actually want to ask you two questions. And I often do this on the podcast where I ask a question, I’d say for selfish reasons. And then and then I ask a question for the whole audience.

 

01;02;45;11 – 01;03;02;28

Lauren Brollier Newton

So two questions and we’ll bring this in for landing here. As I’m hearing you talk about this oneness that we’re all connect, it’s not like the infinite side of Kirsten’s nature is over here in the infinite side of Lauren’s answers over here, do you think the idea of deja vu comes because we all are ultimately just connected infinitely?

 

01;03;03;05 – 01;03;08;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

Like when you have an experience? Like, I know I’ve never lived this experience, but it’s deja vu.

 

01;03;08;23 – 01;03;30;27

Kirsten Welles

Or wow, that is like that. That opens up a whole nother rabbit hole. So this this is our view for three. Yeah. That’s that is. Yeah, yeah. Especially with sort of like the whole theories upon theories now and, you know, quantum nature of things and you know, is it all, you know, a multiverse that’s happening simultaneously. And what is that really?

 

01;03;30;27 – 01;04;04;22

Kirsten Welles

And, and all that. So I don’t even know, you know, how one could, at least I for me personally, how I could even really answer that question. I think that, trusting I have to speak for myself, I think, and trusting in the, in the, in the, in the knowing of things is that I think as we come into this individuated expression, I think there’s a part of us that is maybe present, perhaps identified as a soul, which does have an understanding of, you know, us in our evolution and our experiences.

 

01;04;04;22 – 01;04;24;23

Kirsten Welles

And I don’t know that there’s any there’s a linear time to that, so to speak, but I think it knows the lessons and knows. And so it’s that sort of precognition or that deja vu experience. It’s like, oh yeah, my, I know this, because I know it from that part of my nature. Right? Yes.

 

01;04;24;26 – 01;04;41;00

Lauren Brollier Newton

Yeah. We’ll go we’ll on part three, we’ll do a quantum physics rabbit hole and you go, I’ll go on that. Okay. So now I’m going to ask you the question that I ask every guest that comes on this podcast. If you were building a coaching business from the ground up, this means you can’t take your email list.

 

01;04;41;02 – 01;04;56;18

Lauren Brollier Newton

You know, you’re you’re literally building a coaching business from scratch tomorrow. You can take your wisdom, but you can’t take, you know, email list the clients you have right now. You’re building it from scratch. What would be the first move that you would make?

 

01;04;56;21 – 01;05;19;15

Kirsten Welles

The first move I would make would be really out of this conversation we were having today is I would I would meditate, I would connect with the infinite side of my nature, and I would be like, show me. Know what is. Show me, really show me in the sense of direct me, guide me, that part of myself.

 

01;05;19;15 – 01;05;39;23

Kirsten Welles

This isn’t something outside of me, right? This is the infinite side of my nature. But really show me, guide me, direct me, you know? In what ways can I be of service and and let that infinite side of my nature guide me? Because when I’m in that frequency, in that thought of being of service and that show me and guide me.

 

01;05;39;26 – 01;06;00;26

Kirsten Welles

This is where synchronous meetings will occur. You know, things out of the blue, the world will begin to, you know, organize itself accordingly. But I want to be coming from that energy of, of service, from the infinite side of my nature, and it will show me images that will become a vision. It will it will guide my steps.

 

01;06;00;29 – 01;06;09;01

Kirsten Welles

Yeah. I think that that is the first place I would go and I would just take every step, you know, from that energy.

 

01;06;09;03 – 01;06;35;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

So good. If you love hearing from Kirsten Wells and you are feeling this, I’m going to call it a soul recognition. Like, yeah, I’m part of that lineage, too. I’m part of this soul family. Somehow I happened upon this podcast. We would love to invite you into a next step with Brave Thinking Institute, so you can listen to the outro of this podcast in particular, in particular to coaching and wanting to become a coach in this modality.

 

01;06;35;23 – 01;06;56;24

Lauren Brollier Newton

And if you’re not 100% sure you want to become a coach or you are a coach, but you want more of Kirsten Wells or this kind of teaching, then my invitation to you is just go to Brave Thinking institute.com, go down a rabbit hole and just trust that whatever calls out to you on the website, whatever program or free resource or something that calls to you, you’ll know the right step to take.

 

01;06;56;26 – 01;07;00;20

Lauren Brollier Newton

Kirsten, thank you for being here. And I look forward to part three because we’re for sure.

 

01;07;00;23 – 01;07;02;16

Kirsten Welles

Thank you, Laura, I love you so much.

 

01;07;02;16 – 01;07;06;11

Lauren Brollier Newton

Love you. Thank you.

 

01;07;06;13 – 01;07;43;06

Lauren Brollier Newton

Thanks for joining me this week on The Abundant Coach. Visit our website at Brave Thinking institute.com/coach certification where you can dive even deeper with additional resources and exciting opportunities. Be sure to subscribe to the show on iTunes, Spotify, or wherever you listen to your podcast so you’ll never miss an episode. And while you’re at it, if you loved the show, please rate and review to find out how to jump start your abundant coaching career and more about my journey to seven figure coach, check out our free Meant to Be a Life Coach quiz available at bty.com/coach quiz.

 

01;07;43;08 – 01;07;45;04

Lauren Brollier Newton

I’ll see you in the next episode.